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Survival Guide..... Day 42: The world  seems such a desolate place now.  How has it come to this.  I dream of days past.  Our neighbor continues to mow the lawn.  Why?!  

Welcome to the Wren in the Willows.  Sometimes scheduling conflicts prevent us from meeting you at the home.  We have put some information here to make your stay the best it can be 

First and foremost….WiFi.  NO wait.  Coffee!!   Yes, then we will get to WiFi

Coffee, can be found in 2 places.  The Keurig station in the upstairs hall has coffee (and hot tea) in the top drawer and glasses in both side doors.  Additionally, a percolator is in the kitchen on the bar.  The coffee grounds are in the white cannister labeled “Coffee” located in in the shelf of the built-in china hutch

Wifi Definitely NOT an FBI van   Password: dontbesuspicious

Extra Supplies can be found in the upstairs hallway closet between the Alice in Wonderland and Great Gatsby rooms.  It contains everything from ironing board to first aid kit.  You can also find things such as extra towels, toilet paper, soaps and other things you may have forgotten to bring.  I’m typing too much here!  Just go take a look

Weird Toilette Fact.  Press handle for ½ flush.  HOLD down for full flush (Awkward. It had to be said. Lets move on)

Windows.  Don’t open them please.  100 year old windows have to be sealed for efficiency.  Opening them breaks this seal.  Then I have to work to seal them again.  And let’s be honest, I’m lazy.  Don’t do it

Extra Blankets can be found in the living room, lounging on furniture, or rolled up near fireplace

Storage.  Each room has hooks for hangers. You may have to look for them. They are not always obvious.  Some will have hangers already on them.  There are extra hangers in the amenities closet

Kitchen.  Miscellaneous food, drinks, and supplies (check out that oxford comma) can be found in the fridge and pantry.  You shouldn’t go hungry. You must walk deeper into the pantry to see the food.  It is deeper than it looks at first glance

Music.  There is an Amazon Echo in the Living Room, Kitchen, Upstairs Landing, and Library.  Feel free to say, “Alexa…. Play soothing classical” or, “Alexa… Play soothing classical on Main House” to play throughout home.  You can then say, “Alexa.. volume up. Volume down. Stop. Tell me a joke” etc.

Games.  Tons of games in the library.  Most are easier to learn than you would think.  The hosts have been known to occasionally accept an invite to hang out and teach/play games.  ……Just say’in.  Sometimes, even getting you access to the private basement speakeasy/bar….   Sometimes

House Mystery.  I’m not sure what you have heard, but we don’t have one.  I have no idea what you are talking about, so don’t ask again and Don’t Open the Envelope!

Falconry.  Why are we talking about Falconry?  Louis is a licensed falconer and will bring his hawk out to feed and exercise her many evenings.  If you are interested in hearing about falconry or meeting a hawk.  Let us know

Louis 903-747-7735 / Angel 817-821-3874

Satisfaction not guaranteed. Consult primary care physician before breathing.  If you are stressed or feel anxiety, hold your breath and count to Three.  Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out! Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then…all will be good.  Fine print simply to fill in space and not waste paper.  Please don’t break into our private bar. Really.  Please.

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